


No Big Deal

by mariadperiad20



Series: Foray into B99 [2]
Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Non-Consensual Touching, Protective Team, Season 1 Episode 5, Sexual Harassment, Vulture is creepy, bamf!team, it's episode compliant for about 30 seconds, other tags that totally go here, then i just do my own thing lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-02
Updated: 2019-04-02
Packaged: 2019-12-31 23:16:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18323942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mariadperiad20/pseuds/mariadperiad20
Summary: Jake sucked in an involuntary breath, every muscle in his body going tense. He forced himself to keep his arms crossed, not wanting to react and throw the smarmy bastard into the tile. As Vulture left, an uncomfortable silence filled the precinct. Jake could feel everyone's eyes on him, a mixture of shock, anger, and, if he didn't know any better,concerncoming from them.He swallowed hard, forced himself to relax, and said, "Well, that's the worst thing that's ever happened to me."In season 1 episode 5, the Vulture slaps Jake's ass twice. What if this had been treated seriously, and not played for laughs?





	No Big Deal

Jake was pissed. Really, really pissed. Vulture had swooped in, yet again, to steal his arrest out from under him. The guy was watching this precinct specifically, Jake just knew it. Vulture would always come into the 99 more than any other division, and his appearance was always met with some mixture of distaste and outright hatred. For Jake specifically, it was with a sense of resigned disgust.

Of course, Jake knew that Vulture loved that he was hated. He only had an ounce of authority, but he always made sure that everyone under him could feel it. Still, this was the first time he had come to the 99 after the captaincy change, probably because he wanted to scope out Holt first.

As much as Jake loved the old captain, he was... a bit too casual when it came to Vulture. Let some things slip that maybe other captains wouldn't. Like how Vulture would call the women "honey" and, famously, asked Rosa to get him coffee. Let's just say that after taking one sip of that he'd never bothered her again. Or how he would act around Jake. He would throw around words and comments to everyone, but with Jake he would always get a little too close for comfort, touch him on the back or waist, or on his leg if he was sitting. Somehow, Vulture always found a way to make some form of contact with Jake every time he "stopped by".

"And hey, feel free to call me anytime you need me to come here and powder that big white ass of yours." Vulture slapped his ass and strode away, file in hand, smug grin in place.

Jake sucked in an involuntary breath, every muscle in his body going tense. He forced himself to keep his arms crossed, not wanting to react and throw the smarmy bastard into the tile. As Vulture left, an uncomfortable silence filled the precinct. Jake could feel everyone's eyes on him, a mixture of shock, anger, and, if he didn't know any better, _concern_ coming from them.

He swallowed hard, forced himself to relax, and said, "Well, that's the worst thing that's ever happened to me."

Jake had meant it to sound like a joke, but a little too much honesty bled through, turning it into more of a statement than anything else.

"Jake," Amy asked, standing up slowly, "Are you... okay?"

"Huh?" He tried to grin, "Totally! Most action I've had all day, right?"

Amy reached out, and Jake made sure not to flinch as she touched his arm. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah Amy, I'm fine. I'm an adult man, I got it." He uncrossed his arms, walking back to his desk. "Man! Vulture got his dirty shoes on my croissant!" He flopped back into his chair, swiveling to face Amy. "So, you gonna keep staring, or...?" Jake hoped she would take the out, move on from this pointless, weird conversation. Which, by the way, was occurring in the suddenly dead-silent precinct, with several people watching. Even Gina had put down her phone, a rare occasion.

"Jake," God Amy needed to stop using that voice, it was the soft voice she used when she was interviewing victims and it made Jake's blood boil, "I really don't think that was appropria-"

"It's fine!" Jake shouted, before stopping, taking a moment to gather his cool. "Just drop it, Santiago." He turned back around, muttering, "I don't see why you'd care, anyway." Oops. He hadn't meant to say that out loud.

"Excuse me?" Her voice pitched higher, "Of course I care! We're... we're teammates. Besides, it's no fun to beat you if you're not on your A-game, right?"

"Sure. Now leave me alone, I need to plot revenge for him stealing my case."

Amy sighed. "Alright, but just, if you need to talk, I'm here, okay?"

Jake pretended to ignore her, and she left, going back to her own desk. Slowly, as he typed away resolutely in silence, the hum of chatter and work began to pick up once again, everyone returning to their normal tasks.

A hand smacked down next to his computer, and Jake's head shot up, turning to see Rosa standing over him.

"Yo, Peralta," Her voice was just as short and aggressive as always, "Let me know how the revenge thing goes. I'd be happy to break his fingers for you."

"Uh... thanks," Jake nodded slowly, "I was thinking more like, pranks or something, but..."

Rosa slapped him on the back, hard. "No one hits you but me. Got it?"

"I'll... keep that in mind." Jake looked up, and saw Terry's desk empty. "Hey, Rosa, you haven't seen Terry have you?"

"He's over there."

Jake looked to where she was pointing, and groaned. Terry was in Holt's office, talking to him _using hand gestures_.

"If that has to do with me I will riot."

The door opened, and Terry slid out, followed by Holt. "Peralta, my office. Now."

Jake shot a glare as he got to his feet, walking past Rosa. "I'm not buying you any yogurt next week."

Terry shrugged, "Terry values his relationship with you over yogurt."

Jake glowered, but didn't really have a response. Terry was good guy, was trying to do the right thing but it just wasn't helping right now. Instead, he walked into Holt's office, and closed the door. Well, it was a little too hard of a close, close to a slam, but he was having a rough day. Everyone kept talking to him and asking him if he was okay and it was just getting absurd.

"It has been brought to my attention that Detective Pembroke made unwanted physical advances towards you." Holt's voice was just as neutral as ever, giving nothing away.

Jake threw his hands in the air. "It's fine! Everyone is more upset about this than I am, it's really not that big a deal!"

"Not a big deal?" Holt leaned forward in his chair. Oh no, he was getting into monologue position. Sure enough, "When I came out, my coworkers were extremely inappropriate. Their behavior was abysmal, and such harassment was allowed to occur because the captain wanted me gone but they couldn't fire me themselves."

"With all due respect, Captain, it's different for me now. Really, Vulture messes with everyone, it's not targeted towards me. I just happened to be the one he went for this time."

"So he does this to others on the force?"

"Well, no." Jake crossed his arms, "He doesn't touch other people, thankfully, or else I'd have beaten the crap out of him a long time ago."

"But he _has_ made unwanted contact with you before?" Holt kept asking questions, kept needling, and Jake felt like he was about to scream.

He reminded himself to keep his cool, this was just standard boss behavior. "He hasn't slapped me on the ass before, if that's what you mean."

"That's not what I asked."

Jake gritted his teeth. "Yes, _sir_ , he has made 'physical contact' with me," He used air quotes, "but it's fine. I don't even care. He could ruin my career if he wanted, it wouldn't even be worth it."

"Oh really Peralta? You don't care, which is why the fact he has power of your job matters?"

Holt's eyebrows were raised, and Jake felt his mouth go dry. "I don't... not... I, uh, heh," He chuckled, humorless, "Got me there, I guess."

"Have you brought this up to your previous captain?"

"I tried to once, actually, but he started snoring so I left. Seriously, he only comes around every now and then and he never does anything to anyone important so it's fine."

Holt's eye twitched, almost imperceptibly. "Anyone important?"

Oops. Jake probably shouldn't have said that. "... Yeah?"

Holt nodded once, shortly. "I will take care of this issue. You may go."

"Wait, Captain, you can't-" Jake was trying to get out too many words at once, they were all bunching up in his head. "You barely got this position, you can't go stirring pots, they'll demote you back to... PR-ville, or whatever. Just leave it alone, it doesn't matter."

"I will take that into consideration. You are dismissed."

Jake was already halfway out the door when he paused, turning back to see Holt's enigmatic face watching him. "I'd rather have you as my captain and have to deal with Vulture every now and then than have you gone and him out to get me." Jake admitted, before leaving, closing the door behind him, far more gently than when he had entered.

People were watching him again. Jake shot them an awkward finger-guns, moving back to his desk, and promptly delving back into his work. He didn't want to think about how "helpful" everyone was being right now. It was inconvenient, and it was pointless. Vulture wasn't important, and, as nice as it was, Jake's ass wasn't that important, either.

\----

Later that night, corkscrew in hand, Jake delivered the Vulture the win he so desparately wanted. All he had to do was take it and crawl back to his plastic-wrapped motorcycle, away from their precinct.

Instead, and of course, he couldn't just leave. No, no, he had to go and get in Jake's face, again.

"Keep up the bad work, champ." Another slap, and he was out the door.

"Hmmm," Jake hissed, before looking up to Holt, "Why does he keep touching my butt?"

Holt was staring at Vulture's retreating form with something akin to an actual emotion on his face. And it looked suspiciously like anger.

"Uh... Captain?" Jake asked slowly, uncrossing his arms, "You okay there? You look a little upset-"

"Pembroke!"

Oh my god Holt was speaking in a loud tone of voice. Jake found himself jumping out of the Captain's path as he walked, no, marched over to where Pembroke was now standing, waiting.

"Oh, my apologies. Were you planning to congratulate me in front of your precinct?" He asked with a smile.

Holt looked like he was about to punch said smile off of Vulture's face.

"Look here, young man." Holt's voice was low and dangerous, and Jake could feel the hairs on the back of his neck rise at the sound.

"You _ever_ lay so much as a finger on one of my people again and I will have you thrown out of the force. Do not test me."

Vulture shrugged flippantly, "Not like Jake ever told me to stop. We're just two bros, hanging out." He faked a look of realization, "I suppose someone like you would read into that though, wouldn't you? I'm so sorry, I should explain, _not_ everyone wants to screw men-"

Oh, at some point Jake had used his feet to leave Holt's office and was now standing next to him, across from a smirking Vulture whose mouth was, unfortunately, still moving. Maybe he should do something about that.

Jake's knuckles met Vulture's cheek, hard, knocking him down into Scully's desk, and then to the ground.

Holt turned to Jake. "That was unnecessary. I had the situation under control." Despite his wording, he sounded... pleased.

"Yeah, well, I told you, if he went after anyone important then I'd beat the crap out of him. I'd kick him, too, but there are too many witnesses for that."

Holt shook his head at him, before turning to Scully. "When he wakes up, kindly inform him that the 99 is getting the collar for the murder, and that if he has a problem with that he can talk to a lawyer about a sexual harassment defense."

"Sure. But he'd better clean up my desk, too. He got blood on it." Scully replied, flashing Jake a thumbs-up from behind "paperwork" that Jake knew was actually a coloring book.

"Now, then, Peralta, get back to work." Was Holt smiling at him? Jake did a double-take. Yep, Holt was _smiling_.

"Sure thing, Captain." Jake gave a mock salute, before walking back to his desk, fist-bumping Rosa as he passed by.

And, if when Vulture woke up and crawled back to Major Crimes, he found out he had been demoted after a flood of complaints about his behavior, that had nothing to do with the 99. Nothing at all.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my second b99 fic. I tried to make it... uh... better? Hopefully not terrible? This particular episode really bothered me, so I'm glad I had the chance to do a fix-it (or fic-it, lol) in fic form.
> 
> Comment, if you want :)


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